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Shuttle Mediation

There has been an increase in matters proceedings to court for parenting matters where exemption from mediation has been applied for by the parties involved.


For an exemption from mediation, the court has to be satisfied that there are reasonable grounds to believe that:

Ø There has been abuse of the child by one of the parties to proceedings;

Ø There would be a risk of abuse of the child if there were to be a delay in applying for the order

Ø There has been family violence by one of the parties to the proceedings;

Ø There is a risk of family violence by one of the parties to the proceedings;

Ø An Application for contravention is filed in relation to an issue less than 12 months after a final order is made and the court is satisfied All the following conditions are satisfied there are reasonable grounds to believe that the person has behaved in a way that shows a serious disregard for his/her obligations under the order.

Ø The application is made in circumstances of urgency; or

Ø a party is unable to participate effectively in mediation because of mental/physical health issues, location or some other reason.

Ø Other circumstances in the regulations are satisfied.


However, for those parties who are represented, this now means at least a year in court, and you will probably have to sell your house to fund your legal costs.


The court process is extremely traumatic, not only for the parties involved, but those around them, including the children the parents are fighting about in court.


The children are going to be the ones that witness the continual conflict between their parents. Often, the children won’t even be allowed to see one of their parents. The mum or dad looking after the children will be financially and emotionally traumatised and that will affect the children dramatically.


Children often feel torn between their parents, especially when they are asked to take sides or share sensitive information about one parent with the other. This loyalty conflict can place a heavy emotional burden on them.


Prolonged exposure to parental conflict during court proceedings can have long-term consequences for children's mental health and well-being. It may contribute to issues such as low self-esteem, depression, anxiety, behavioural problems, and difficulties in forming healthy relationships.


The focus on legal battles and disputes can sometimes distract parents from maintaining a nurturing and supportive relationship with their children. This disruption in the parent-child bond can further exacerbate the emotional trauma experienced by children.



An alternative is to attempt mediation via shuttle.


Shuttle mediation is where neither party can see or hear on another, all communication is facilitated by a third party, the mediator.


Shuttle mediation provides a controlled environment that minimizes direct contact between parties, reducing the likelihood of confrontations and allowing for a more focused and productive process.

In situations where there is a significant power imbalance, ongoing conflict, or strained relationships, shuttle mediation can help preserve or rebuild trust. By providing a neutral and confidential setting, parties may feel more comfortable expressing their needs and concerns, which can contribute to repairing damaged relationships or fostering a cooperative co-parenting dynamic in family disputes.


Shuttle mediation offers flexibility in scheduling and location. Parties do not need to be physically present in the same room or adhere to strict time constraints, making it easier to accommodate busy schedules or situations where distance is a factor. This convenience can promote greater participation and engagement in the mediation process.


At the very least, it is an attempt by both parties to come to some sort of agreement about their children. Their children are the most important individuals in their lives, and how Mom and Dad approach their parenting will affect the children for the rest of their lives.

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I am a lawyer and a chartered accountant whose had the privilege of working in many different countries with many different cultures all over the world. I hope my experiences, both good and bad,  have made me wiser. Life brings experience and age brings wisdom. The more different we think we are, the more alike we become.

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